Wednesday, April 14, 2021


To say this last year has been a struggle for me would be an understatment. My mental health, the mental health of many I love, overall health, work, finances, church, missing people, all of it has been hard. I've felt like a fish out of water floundering around for the last few years, not sure where I belong or fit in, but this past several months have felt like I'm gasping for air and further away from finding solid ground or a fish tank, ocean, lake, etc. I have not been sure how to move forward or how to move at all. At the beginning of 2021, by many things I read and heard, expectations were high for a more "normal" year. To be honest, that did not provide comfort for me but more anxiety. I have never dealt with anxiety like I have over the last year. Sure, I've had moments of anxiousness and some legitmiate moments of panic; but I have not dealt with this consistently until this 2021. This past Sunday was our first in person contemporary church service inside of our church in over a year. Our pastor delivered a very meaningful and impactful sermon regarding the topic of worry and anxiety. It spoke to me as I'm sure it did to many. Because The Bible tells us not to be anxious does not mean we automatically flip a switch and are feeling peaceful and calm. What this scripture does provide for many of us is hope and the truth that we are covered by the love of Jesus. A few years ago, I decided to be intentional in reaching out to people when God laid them on my heart. I've done a fairly good job of sticking with that, but there are sometimes when I thought to myself...I'm not ready. But the more I opened my heart to Him, the more I realized that it wasn't about me being ready; but instead about being obedient. In 2021, I've reached out every single time God has led me to do so. I've had many wonderful responses of gratitude from people....some who I have not been in regular or any contact with in several years. Sometimes it was hard and uncomfortable, and sometimes it was easy and felt like second nature. But it has been a blessing every single matter the response....because it was something I knew I was supposed to do. Something I've learned about myself is that freedom lies in obedience,even if it is hard and uncomfortable. I don't know what this year holds, but I know that Jesus is our hope! He is steadfast, and He walks with us through everything, even if we don't feel it. 

 Matthew 6:34 Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. 
Phillipians 4:6-7 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7 And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. 
Matthew 6:25 “That is why I tell you not to worry about everyday life—whether you have enough food and drink, or enough clothes to wear. Isn’t life more than food, and your body more than clothing?

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