Monday, November 7, 2016
All Saints Day...Russ!
I've had a lot on my heart, my mind, my hands. I know that if I don't write it down right that minute, it will never get written; so much of it will never get written. This time of year takes me back to the death of my dad. Today is the anniversary of his death 11 years ago. So much of that time is a blur, but the things I remember were meant to be remembered and to bring me encouragement and peace. Yesterday in church we honored our saints for All Saints Day. The first song played was "I'll Fly Away". I immediately smiled and looked at my husband, and he knew what I was thinking. We played that song at my dad's funeral on Nov. 11, 2005. My dad was the greatest. He was funny and kind and tender. He had his faults and was not perfect, but really he was just the best I could have ever hoped for in a father. I miss him like crazy, and I really miss him like crazy for his grandkids. He was such a great Papa. When he was diagnosed with lung cancer that summer, it had already spread to his brain and bones. It was only a few short months later that he passed. It's such an odd feeling trying to prepare yourself to say goodbye to someone, who is one of the biggest pieces of your life, all the while trying to hold on to some hope that things will change all in a few short months. The first time I saw him seize and then scream out in pain, I knew time remaining with him was short. As hard as it was, I was so very thankful that I was there when he died. I have found myself getting in a funk sometimes when I think about my kids without grandparents and Neil and I without parents, but God continues to give me peace and show me the blessings we have in our lives because of our saints. Thanks Be To God!