Church

I've been thinking a lot about church lately and what exactly it means to me.  Let me start with this definition by Merriam Webster:

Definition of church

1: a building for public and especially Christian worship 

2: the clergy or officialdom of a religious body 

• the word church … is put for the persons that are ordained for the ministry of the Gospel, that is to say, the clergy
•  —J. Ayliffe

3often capitalized : a body or organization of religious believers: such as 

a : the whole body of Christians 

• the one church is the whole body gathered together from all ages
•  —J. H. Newman

b : denomination 

• the Presbyterian church

c : congregation

• they had appointed elders for them in every church
•  —Acts 14:23 (Revised Standard Version)

4: a public divine worship  

• goes to church every Sunday

5: the clerical profession  

• considered the church as a possible career

From the start of my life, the church has always been more than just "a building" to me.  I longed for a church I could call home from the time I was very young.  I never really felt comfortable or accepted in church.  Maybe that's because of my upbringing and the church I attended? Maybe it's because my mama never felt accepted in church?  I'm not really sure the reason, I just know what I felt.  I've attended the same church for 20+years with my family. It's definitely been a second home to my family, and I've made some of my best friends in that entity.  It's weird though, because I have felt less like I belong with each passing year.  It's not really the church I attend, that I don't feel like I belong, as much as it is the church in general.  Actually I think it's more of a restlessness that I feel.  There's no perfect person, so there's no perfect church or religion or pastor or rabi or priest or lay leader.  When I find myself in a state of restlessness or feeling like an outcast (not by any person but myself), I feel like God is stirring something in me.  I use to think I was a really settled person, but as I've grown older and experienced more; I've realized that I'm not.  Sure I am thankful for a home, a family and friends to help keep life full and stable.  But I've discovered that a lot of my restlessness comes from my longing for adventure.  The longer you stay in one place, the more likely it is you're going to be disappointed by someone or something.  Disappointment is part of life and running away isn't the answer, but I also think a fresh start or a new adventure can be a real good thing....even if you haven't been disappointed.   It sounds nice to be someplace new and learn about the things there and then move on to another place.  It's freeing and sounds just lovely.  God lead us...all of us!

I Love You My Friend!

One morning on the train in Chicago, I was people watching; because that’s what I do. Studying people, because nobody was really talking; so I couldn’t eavesdrop. 😉😂 I was looking at all the different faces thinking...isn’t it simply the most flabbergasting thing to think of all the people you will see one time in your entire life and never see again? Seriously think about that...so many lovely and interesting people that we only see once and maybe never even speak to.  Think of what you could be missing and what they could be missing in you.  They have purpose, they have worth, they have love; and so do you!

As the week went on, I studied people everywhere we went. I saw some kindness and some unkindness. I saw some quiet people, loud people and all in between. I saw a lot of people without much.  Some with smiles and joy and some without. I always wonder about their journey. I wonder how someone with no place to go, no food to eat, nothing but the few things in the plastic bag beside them can be smiling so big.  And I wonder about those who don't smile or make any eye contact.  I wonder about the one who holds the sign that says "Homeless and Ashamed" and the one who shakes his cup full of rocks to make it sound like it is full of change.  I wonder about the ones who have animals.  I wonder about the ones who don't.  And then I wonder about the people who pass by, the ones who I saw cruelly making fun or teasing the people who are trying to make a few bucks.  What journey are they on?  It doesn't seem any better than the one who is "Homeless and Ashamed".  We are all children of God. He loves us all the same.  The ones in need, the ones ashamed, the ones who are cruel, the ones who smile, the ones who don't.  If we could just remember that we look different on the outside, but we are mostly the same on the inside; I think things might be better.