Friday, October 3, 2014
I haven't written in quite a while which is very unlike me. Even when I don't write on my blog, I write; but I haven't. I have thoughts in my head and heart, but I haven't had the words....I haven't had the words. Tonight I was putting clean sheets on my bed, and I folded up the quilt at the end of my bed, the one my great grandmother made. For a fleeting moment, I thought....I need to call mom and ask her about this quilt again, but...well you know. There was that instant piercing pain and that feeling of being punched in the stomach. It didn't last long this time. Sunday will be 5 months since she died. Sometimes it seems like a long time ago, and other times....I almost forget she's not down the street. Today Elli asked me, "What was Moo's name?" I had never thought about her not knowing her grandmother's name, but really why would she? She/we always called her Moo, and Moo is what my mama loved to be called. I said her name out loud a few times...."Sandy, Sandra, Sandy"....then I thought about the last word she said to me..."HI"! I miss her. I miss my dad. I'm glad they're together.