Let Me Clarify.....

I have to get something off my chest....Once again.....I have to say that I hope this post is not offensive to anyone who reads it. If it is, I apologize; but it's from the deepest part of my heart. READY, SET, GO!!!!
I have 2 great friends, who I have known longer than half of my life, Todd and Joey. They were high school sweethearts and got married in our early twenties. They are happily married with 6, 7th on the way, children. Todd and Joey are devoted to each other, their children, their friends but mostly to GOD! When Joey told me last Sunday that she was expecting.....she called me and said "I am about to send out an e-mail, to everyone (meaning her family and our friends) I know, would you read it and tell me what you think?" I said "Absolutely" already knowing what the e-mail would be about before I ever read it. As I read it, I was correct in what it was about, but I was not correct in my assumption about how she would announce their joyful news. You see Joey was struggling with this great news of a new baby, because of the great suffering our Lifelong friend who just lost her second son was experiencing, along with the fact that her own sister had just suffered her 3rd miscarriage; but she was also struggling with the negative remarks she would encounter about having ANOTHER baby. I read the e-mail that announced their upcoming blessing, and as I read Joey's words about how she and Todd truly believe that God is in control of their family and its size, but also that some of us (meaning the readers of the e-mail) would think they were crazy. I realized that she (like many people with several children myself included) had felt like their good news would be met by criticism, questioning, or condesension. After I read her e-mail, I called her back; and we began a discussion about this. Of course I started with a true offering of congratulations, a little discussion about how envious I was, and some reassurance that her e-mail was worded very appropriately, for her sister who had just suffered her 3rd miscarriage and our Lifelong Friend who had just lost her second son at birth. Then we began to talk about the true blessing of a child, in every circumstance, that we both believe a child is a blessing from God. Now don't misunderstand what I'm saying here....I know many people, actually most people I know (NPayne included here), who are completely satisfied with controlling their family size; and I think that it is very admirable for folks to know.....this is it for us, we are completely content with our family size. I truly respect people who know their limits. Again don't misunderstand me when I include NPayne in the above statement and not myself, because I am so thankful and so blessed with my family and my children. If you remember in a previous post....To Envy or To Be Envied, I talk about the longing and the urge that I have to have more children. Don't get me wrong, being a mother is hard work; and I am by no means a perfect mother or even close to a perfect mother.....far from it. And just because I would have loved to have a house full, wait a minute I already have a house full, let's just say several more children; doesn't make me a great mother or a saint or crazy or delusional. It's just how I feel. As I'm sure most mothers would agree....my children make me a better person....they make me want to try harder, to be more faithful, to be more patient, to be a good example, to be a better servant, to seek the kingdom of God. Today in my Bible Study, we talked about talents; so I came home and looked up the word talent in the dictionary. One of the definitions was....a power of mind or body considered as given to a person for use and improvement: so called from the parable in Matt. 25:14–30....The Parable of the Three Servants. I suddenly saw this parable in a different way which was completely applicable to my life as a mother. You take what is given to you and do what you can to make it grow or better or improve. Now it also mentions "given to a person for use" which I also saw as completely applicable in my life as a mother. I have always been a christian, and I have always longed for relationship with Jesus; but it wasn't until I became a parent that I really started seeking Him and searching for that relationship. Becoming a mother is what initially brought me closer to Jesus. Originally I wanted to do this for my children, which I still do, but I have learned in the last few years that I want a relationship with Jesus for myself as well; because He longs for one with me. Becoming a parent has made me be much more intentional when I pray and give thanks, it has made me be much more intentional with my actions and choices. Don't get me wrong I get frustrated as a mother, but I have learned that when I become frustrated with my children, I need to take some time and really realize the blessing that I have been given.....the blessing that so many women never experience.....I'm not always 100% right on this, sometimes I stew a bit in my frustration before I give thanks to God for how He has blessed me; but I do always give thanks to Him. If I get frustrated with my children, I have learned that I need to take a deep breath and really think about the magnitude of this blessing....then when my heart is right, I go to Him and thank Him again and again. Becoming a mother was the best gift I have ever received, and I am completely overwhelmed when I think about it. I love being a mother with every ounce of my being.....I'm not saying that if you don't have the urge to have more children that you don't love being a mother with every ounce of your being, because the mothers I know all do; but I think they also know their limits when it comes to family size. I know there are many other women who are just like me, whether they have 1 or 7 or no children, they battle the urge. I guess I haven't discovered my limits yet....maybe it's a good thing that NPayne has discovered his, but I think I have discovered one of my talents.